Comedic Deterrent Seeker Pillows

One more ring and Bob would set off the Solicitor Glove,

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

"Who's got the hammer?"

"Until the plaster sets, try not to laugh."

'... And this is my cellar.'

Man with fishing line going into water. Fishing line coming down from sky.

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

Breast Height Chart

Only then, did Medusa realise her mistake.

Insecurities of the Bald Eagle.

'The guys say that the stripper won't be available before our wedding...would you mind if I had my bachelor party after the honeymoon?'

'Just remember, he's bigger, but you're funnier. As soon as he starts laughing, you've got him!'

'I used to trade in futures until I learned the planet doesn't have one.'

"Haven't you a small one that would fit into a soldier's pack?"

'We're looking with someone with balls...not an enlarged prostate.'

'Alright, alright. I had a hard day fighting crime. No need to get smart about it.'

'Cool it with the herbal shampoo -- you've got aphids.'

'Pay no attention to him. He's just a disgruntled former employee.'

Cat doctor to cat patient sitting on exam table 'All I'm saying is liposuction won't help if you don't lay off the tuna smoothies.'

"He's a super-calloused fragile mystic, hexed by halitosis."

When psychiatry works too well!

Pirate Paddle Boat.

"Call me a hopeless romantic, but I assumed he was just inviting me."

'That time of year, eh Ben, don't know whether to go hunting or fishing?'

How cats see their home

'You're an inspector now?'

A man walking a bowling ball is about to walk into a woman walking a bunch of bowling pins

"When I said the surgery was minimally invasive I wasn't talking about your finances."

"You keep him busy while I go for help."

'It's your lucky day. I just went vegan.'

"That's it - we've eaten the last of the energy bills."

'I'm afraid we don't have any gentlemen on hand right now -- how about a good old boy?'

'These lousy free-range chickens think that they just own the whole world!'