Comedic Delight Seeker Pillows

"Call me a hopeless romantic, but I assumed he was just inviting me."

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

"Until the plaster sets, try not to laugh."

"Who's got the hammer?"

Man with fishing line going into water. Fishing line coming down from sky.

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

Breast Height Chart

Only then, did Medusa realise her mistake.

Beer $.50. I've had lot of psychological therapy, but none of it seems to help. Maybe you

'The guys say that the stripper won't be available before our wedding...would you mind if I had my bachelor party after the honeymoon?'

Insecurities of the Bald Eagle.

'Just remember, he's bigger, but you're funnier. As soon as he starts laughing, you've got him!'

"Haven't you a small one that would fit into a soldier's pack?"

'I used to trade in futures until I learned the planet doesn't have one.'

Joe, this is not my idea of 'paint night at the bar.'

'Alright, alright. I had a hard day fighting crime. No need to get smart about it.'

'Cool it with the herbal shampoo -- you've got aphids.'

"Our records show that you unsubscribed to our company's e-newsletter. We need to have a little talk."

'Pay no attention to him. He's just a disgruntled former employee.'

Cat doctor to cat patient sitting on exam table 'All I'm saying is liposuction won't help if you don't lay off the tuna smoothies.'

How cats see their home

"When I said the surgery was minimally invasive I wasn't talking about your finances."

When psychiatry works too well!

'That time of year, eh Ben, don't know whether to go hunting or fishing?'

"He's a super-calloused fragile mystic, hexed by halitosis."

'... and then he slammed the door in my face...'

A man walking a bowling ball is about to walk into a woman walking a bunch of bowling pins

Pirate Paddle Boat.

"You keep him busy while I go for help."

'It's your lucky day. I just went vegan.'

"That's it - we've eaten the last of the energy bills."

Basically, the problem is with your plumbing. Why wouldn't a plunger make perfect sense?

'An optician was having a closing down sale...I got the last pair!'

'I'm afraid we don't have any gentlemen on hand right now -- how about a good old boy?'

'These lousy free-range chickens think that they just own the whole world!'