Comedic Debt Analyst Gifts

'What do you want first - The bad news or the even badder news?'

'The World will speak hip-hop tomorrow.'

'Just sitting around letting advertisers brainwash me. What about you?'

Help! Have to pay back a big world bank loan.

"That's enough about the noggin and the schnoz. Let's move on to the tummy-wummy and the keister."

'Ick! -- I'd never vote for anybody with hair like THAT!'

I'm here to update your census form. Since you mailed the form in, have any of your children moved back in with you?

Monkey Business College

"You have $3,098 in the bank? I'm impressed! So...do you think about investing it?"

At The Clown Bank.

"So that's my presentation: Could I have 100 million for the startup?"

'One day son, all of this will be yours.'

"Tut! You've tapped in the wrong number again!"

"If you had only listened to me when you were six and not eaten that dirt."

"I understand she's marrying him for his condominium in Fort Lauderdale."

Fisherman Funneral

Invested pot of gold in the stock market.

Build it and, sooner or later, they will come!

"The pound is reaching parity with Liz Truss."

"What??? For that money I used to get at least a judge, a congressman, and a city councilman!!"

'That's our quilt edged investments sorted.'

'Fortunately, I'm serving, concurrently, both my interest and principle.'

Unhappy Cows from neighboring states visit California.

"Honey, I'm home."

'Elections are easier to understand if you think of them as performance art.'

"You can't beat Channel 5's sport coverage."

"Connect the dots"

"We haven't been married long enough for you to reprimand my dog."

'I told you we should have protested against that windfarm'

'...You are on a waiting list to be ill.'