Comedic Cop Conventions Gifts

Police Academy - Remedial Reading of Rights

"Are you the one they call El Cóndor?"

"A new Super Guardian attack vehicle? No no, I built this for Burning man."

'You're an inspector now?'

"Honestly, guys, my check is in the mail."

Pinata Crime Scene Investigation.

The few moments delay was the downfall of 'The Cat'.

"We're all metric now..."

Santa, Alien, Easter Bunny and Sasquatch plan the perfect caper.

"Them's fighting words."

'If it weren't for baseball, this whole thing could have ended much differently.'

'So how do you like the new job?' - 'Not bad, better than walking the streets.'

Golf Crime Scene.

'We would like you to accompany us to the station, sir!'

'Yeah it looks like we finally caught that peeping tom...'

"Ooh, are those Reese's Pieces?"

Police crime scene.

Superheroes.

"Well, if you find it more comfortable, just call it 'cat bath'."

'Say fells,-you don't have it in BROWN do you?'

'They got me for 'hate-texting.''

"What were his last words?"

"I don't think we're supposed to taser people who park on double yellow lines."

'Good cop - bad cop is enough. We don't need morally ambiguous cop.'

'Watch out, he's an eclectic eel!'

"Me? Keeping winning scratch cards? Never!! Champagne officer?"

"By the way, this guy behind me with his fist up my crack has nuthin' to do with this."

"Number three. Take off the hat and sunglasses."

'Yes, it was number 4, I'm positive,'

'We've searched the whole house, and there's still no sign of the evidence. To be honest, I'm starting to think we've got the wrong guy.'

"But on the other hand..."

'The one in the middle is kind of cute!'