Comedian With A Compass Gifts

All Roads Go Nowhere.

You Are Here

Bicycle sat nav.

Right, this is the map of all the UFO sightings. Hold the light steady love.

'You had better eat those intestinal organs or there's no dessert for you!'

Recalculating

"Yeah, uh, maybe you're not cut out to be the 'sparkly' kind of vampire."

'You said I should check back with you if I didn't get any better. . .'

A series of Exit signs.

Moses comes to Los Angeles.

"I touched another squirrel's nuts. Any other questions?"

"The Webb telescope can look FAR back in time to before things were a bit s**t!"

'Now boarding all passengers in the middle class.'

Looking at You Are Here Map "How do they know?"

'I'm sick and tired of begging!'

'They separated us.'

"Hold on, one more thing to go."

"I'm getting the hang of this wake up every morning, and do basically the same thing with different complaints until I die."

"The asteroid has what looks like a small rear end on the back of it."

'The mail is here and it looks like the opticians have written to us.'

Rock the boat.

Cola Observatory

'Have you heard about the origami shop?'

Make Your Own

'You can't get there from here!'

'You're putting that saddle on backwards.' - 'How do you know which way I'm going?'

"Now that the kids and grandkids are grown I can get back to more erotic embroidery."

'Are you paying attention Eurasia?' 'Sorry, I was drifting.'

Intelligent Navigation Device...

'It's no good telling me to eat my grees, Mum. You know I'm colour blind.'