Colorectal Surgeons Gifts

'OK, the old one's in my right hand, the donor's in my left. Rght?'

"Oh, I like coming to the dentists. It's the only place where people actually ask me to spit!"

"Until the plaster sets, try not to laugh."

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

Summer 2000: Children stumble upon the remains of Linda Tripp's old head.

The tooth fairy.

"Four years of dental school only to tell all my patients 'Don't worry about any tooth issues - they'll just fall out and be replaced, anyway'."

"First time pruning?"

'I don't believe it. Five minutes after he gets the darn thing, he has an arrest!'

"I did the best dental health poster in the class. I just hope Mr. Tooth Decay doesn't hold a grudge."

Medical Building Directory: Dr. Larry Nix, Dr. Sally Putty, etc..

"My, grandma, what a big nose you have! Let's take a little off the sides."

"I never thought turning eighty would be so much fun!"

Meanwhile in Hollywood

"She fell down stairs again, so this is her third hip."

"The good news is that your cardiac surgery was a complete success. The bad news is that we had to remove the song from your heart."

"No, Doris, not implants!"

"Pollyanna, your teeth are shot. Stop sugar coating everything!"

'My boyfriend's a Cardiologist.'

Oct. 1982: Researchers attempt an ill-fated procedure in great white shark oral hygiene.

"Really? You can make me look younger!"

Do you think I'm sixty?

"Since you're going to the dentist, I bought you a giant lollipop to go out in style."

'Maybe a helium boob job wasn't such a good idea,babe!'

"He wants to be a plastic surgeon when he grows up."

"I'm afraid you need knee surgery."

'What kind of filling would you like?'

Surgeon carving a chicken/turkey.

'Have you picked out a domain name, yet?'

'Giles is a surgeon who likes to bring his work home with him.'

'I did have a tummy-tuck...But I opted for reconstruction surgery at the same time.'

Improvised Dentistry.