Collegiate Joker Gifts

College store.

'Hmph. College kids.'

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

College. Did you pick a major yet? I'm doing a double major in art and logic --- I want to draw my own conclusions!

"Yes Dad, I passed math and now I'm passing chemistry and physics."

'...And here we have the 'Laugher Curve.''

Type A Freshman - changed courses four times, got a job, organized a protest, quit the job, plans to take second semester abroad.

'I'm majoring in communication and minoring in pizza delivery - What about you?'

'The Great Depression? Didn't they have Prozac then?'

'When I was studying animal husbandry, I met the animal who became my husband.'

'I reckon we have grounds for a libel action, don't you?.'

"No, I'm not the first in my family to attend college. But I am the first at an Ivy."

'I see you have extensive experience eating, sleeping, and mating. That puts you two steps ahead of all the college graduates who have applied.'

"Well, if the test is multiple choice I choose not to take it."

History. The worst past is my dad says they're still making history!

"I think our daughter should change her major. She can now ask for money in 3 different languages!"

Laboratory: Protons /Electrons/Morons

Southwick College: Basically, for the most part, usually - a meritocracy.

Footballer changes shirt with the ref.

'My parents couldn't afford to send me to college, so they let me spend a night at a Ramada.'

'Today: The collective unconscious...'

'Wow, that sounds rigorous. What are the prerequisites for living in my mom's basement?'

'Oh, now that's a nice vase...'

Little known fact: I spent a semester at Reed College in Portland. "Little known facts" are supposed to be momentous. Well, the little known fact is, while I was there, I asked a lady out

Graduation Day At A Party School

Big man on Krampus

'But your book proved that gravity is a very weak force.'

'I'm sorry...we're not sure you're self obsessed enough.'

Professor Clown teaches advanced physics

"Where am I going to find the perfect thesis topic that hasn't been on TikTok already?"

There's just no excuse for your behavior, Al. I thought it was your job to find one, doctor.

Talk the talk...

'I hope it's a taste test. There are no right or wrong answers on a taste test.'

The defence were confident about their offside trap.

'My son is in college and switched out of engineering into fraternity partying. He days he finds it less intense.'