College Reinvention Fan Gifts

'Look at yourself! Ever since college, you've been different. You've changed!' Mark was right. His mother HAD changed.

Go team!

"Someday, these will be installed in every home and business that wants to seem artsy."

"Political Science... that's in the Department of Performing Arts."

'I'm going to have to give up drinking and drugs when I leave uni - to pay off my bank loan.'

Toddler Feeding Solutions

"I didn't take anyone's job. This is my company."

Primordial Schmooze

"We've made significant progress in T-shirt cannon technology."

'I think scroll sounds better than 'continuous media,''

'You talk about her so much. Why don't you invite that Alma Mater of yours to dinner sometime?'

Room-mate Homicides Waiting to Happen. . .

"But you both can't be the 'father' of Ammonium Pentoxide Phosphate."

'We really don't want to say goodbye. So, as a retirement gift - we're upgrading you, so we don't have to!'

"In conclusion, I hope you all make plenty of money to donate to your alma mater."

"I enjoy the game so much more since they invented the self-driving ball!"

'Perfect! -- Now let's build some rest stops!'

"I think that's the newest machine replacing the new machine we just installed."

"I'm afraid Mr. Edison is too busy to discuss your idea what you at this time. Please call again, Mr Fluorescent."

Chinese man has apple land on his head - which inspires him to invent gunpowder.

Wheel

'And look what happened when I turn the tablet sideways - the text swivels the right way up.'

Having heard good things about it, Carlos decides to try the Phlegmish School of painting.

Man sees college fraternity houses 'Kappa Phi', 'Aeta Epsalon' and then 'Beta Carotene', says, 'They major in nutrition.'

'Technology can be addictive. If the above is familiar - get help.'

Adaptability.

"For heaven's sake - just pass me the ketchup!"

Designer

"It's the new series. It'll be on the road this spring."