College Fund Warriors Gifts

I'd quit marauding if it weren't for my kid's college fund. It talks a pillage to raise a child!

"This statement from your headmaster says that you can easily get a good degree...your bank manager says you can't."

"The only thing that's not gone up is the pound."

"What lead you to growing human tests in a test tube?"

"If we take a late retirement and an early death, we'll just squeak by."

'Our short-term solution is money. Our long-term solution is more money.'

Treadway college - A little knowledge, a lot of tuition.

Studying and technology

"I'm so sorry that I screamed...I had a terrible dream: the kids had to leave college and live with us again...Oh, Ed, it was horrible!"

"And what did my little darling do in school today?"

"We got the cactus account!"

"I'm not going to shoot the messenger, but I'm also not going to renew his grant."

I've managed to get your tax bill down to zero, this year ... however, my bill is $10 million.

'Getting back into the market can be stressful. I recommend a portfolio heavy on sleep-aids, tranquilizers, and antacids.'

'This charge is for the office visit, this charge is for blood work, and this charge just about pays off the doc's school loan.'

'My micro is so good it's beginning to grow into the macro.'

MBA, PhD £100,000 student loan. Please Help.

'How to handle market stress' book being thrown through investments office window.

'You might not know it now but I used to have some great lesson plans.'

'The side effects are headaches, sweating,nervousness, and a depressed bank account.'

"Just teachers' lounge will suffice, Ed."

'That's Renfrew -- he's in charge of high-risk portfolios.'

'Thank you, sir. NEXT, PLEASE!'

'Sorry son, I spent all your inheritence fighting inheritence tax.'

'Oh he's my loans officer.'

'Come on. It's time to wage education.'

"Get used to it, Eddie. Stocks below coat basis is the new normal."

"In the time I’ve been on hold with this collection agency, my debt has been bought and sold to another collection agency!"

"Just think, your student loan may outlive you."

"Look! Another non regulated bank!"

"When we got married, you said we'd be in the lap of luxury...but here we are, in the butt of bankruptcy!"

"I need the epipen? I need the epipen?! Where am I going to get that kind of money to pay for it?"

Better Than Roses

Big City Bank Loan manager

'Fellas, I swear I'll get you the money! Remember the money was for my kid's education.'