Collecting Bizarre Experiences Pillows

Man finds a python in his breakfast egg

Competitive Eating Competition Competitive Vomiting Competition,

Tunnel of Whale Guts

"I've put every one of those vital master copies through here, and it took ages. Where do the copies come out?"

Storage Unit of Love

Odd Spas

'Beer? Wassat then?'

"I've been window-shopping..."

"My great-uncle Octavio always wore his hat in the house. That way, if bad company knocked on the door, he could say he was just leaving."

Newton discovers surrealism

"Just once I would like to laugh or to frown."

"Is there any way we could describe this bit of old tart that would make a Russian oligarch pay £2 million for it?"

'I wonder if I should add this to my resume.'

'Have you got to have a Gimmick.'

Furniture faux pas: The coffee table coffin

"First and foremost, I feel that architecture should make a statement."

'We're going to have to pass on the painting - but we'll take a case of this wine!'

'I'd like to return this snake. It's suffering from reptile dysfunction.'

'Who knew college would prep me for a first class upgrade?'

'It was owned by a little ol' lady who didn't drive it. She used a motor scooter on Saturdays.'

"It's not necrophilia if you're both dead."

The Reigate train was more unusual this morning

Moments later, everyone would think Khrushchev was a kook.

'Franken-fauna: Monopod Pig.'

'Could you just sign it 'Bobby'.'

The Tortoise and Hare Delivery Service, Allow 1 to 365 days for delivery,

101 uses of a dead cat: briefcase

"Okay, these people are financing a big part of the movie, so during the lovemaking scenes, try not to drop the snow shovels."

"Just get over there and let me get a picture."

'Oh, do you do Sumo?'

'Great aim. Totally tweetworthy.'

'A new activity for THE DANGEROUS SPORTS CLUB collecting tyre impressions'