Cold Climate Jokers Gifts

'Oh, come on -- you can't have the summertime blues!'

'I'll be glad when winter is over and he can start buryi8ng bones again.'

Just because I'm adapted to the cold, doesn't mean I like it!

"How come we never have 'Baked Alaska'?"

"I love this time of year."

'I don't get it. They told me to serve merlot at room temperature.'

"It looks like it's an eye bank."

"This heat transfer dance had better work. I'm freezing my tail off!"

"It's so warm that I'm laying hard boiled eggs."

"Turns out it was all water weight."

'Where is the global warming when you want it?'

'What's Iggy doing home from school at this time of day?'

'Okay, but for future reference; We never grit the ice in here.'

Need to turn up heat(fish crowd heater in aquirium).

Eskimo Breaking Wind

"Shrinkage /ˈSHriNGkij/ noun: 1. the contraction of an object when cooled, 2. the 'Naked Cowboy' in Times Square on a really cold day."

"With the way the weather is these days I went ahead and packed my bathing suit, sun screen and cross country skis."

"The bad news is climate change is for real. The good news is it will make the liberal left extinct by 2050."

'What do you mean, you want rollerblades?'

"It's an ice scraper. I sweat a lot."

"Now that my new bikini arrived, I am ready for global warming."

'I'm not the first visionary who's been accused of extreme optimism.'

"Now, maybe you'll see why I want the thermostat kept below 32 degrees."

'No, not abominable. The normal kind.'

Can't a guy have a hobby?

Snow-shoe Tennis

'...I think he's died of indecent exposure.'

"A brand new credit card and not an ATM in sight!:

"Every time I turn the hot water on the sink disintegrates."

'He's running a high fever.'

'It's frozen solid Darling: We're not meant to have aquariums...'

Freezing Penguins

"Shadow? All these years I thought that was my ex-wife!"

"I don't think much of this new deodorant"

I think I'm retaining water.