Cognitive Jugglers Gifts

You have reached the end of your brain...

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

"Still, diving for it would look good on my college application.

Surgeon finds a doohickey on the patient's thingamabob.

"We need a best practice swim lane to leverage our core competency, move the needle outside the box, and open the kimono while keeping our ducks in a row. Can anyone give me a sustainable solution to more vertical effectiveness without getting too granula

"We have an acronym!"

"It's a new target to target a time to reduce targets so that we'll be less target driven!"

"I never accomplish the impossible, if I did it would become an expectation."

A Bloody Butcher

"It's time to retire the word 'profit'."

Wordplay: In The Bag.

'Excellent!...We've been looking to hire someone who can think outside the box.'

'Would everyone please phrase their questions in ones and zeros please.'

'A High-pain job? Yes, I believe we have that.'

"...our Annual Report has been criticised for lack of clarity - well done!"

'It's easy, Greg. Just get in touch with your inner regional sales manager.'

"It's a swearbox."

"There's a conversation to be had around a piece of work I'd like us to do tonight."

'Sorry to interrupt Dixon - but this is not what I meant when I said this company needed more blue-sky thinking!'

"I lost some intellectual property here last night. Anybody remember what the hell I was talking about?"

'Well I like to think every cloud has a silver lining.'

"We're to stop talking about 'budget cuts'. Apparently it's depressing for staff and clients..."

"I do like you, Peter, but interfacing is a very serious step."

"Abbreviations here, abbreviations there, and one is more incomprehensible than the next!"

"We were looking for somebody with experience in mumbo-jumbo but your resume is mainly about gobbledegook."

"I'll start thinking outside the box when the box is empty."

Harris, our Annual Report has been criticised for lack of clarity - well done.

'I was headhunted.'

Senior PGA Moment.

"Remember, when they go low... we observe shareholder value and act accordingly."

"I wrote a letter to the Wall Street Journal saying the term 'Bear Market' makes me look like a loser, but they didn't print it."

"The subaqueous qualities of the biomorphic forms spacially undermine the larger metaphorical resonance of the mark-making."

'All my venture capital is tied up in Miss Umpley, there.'

New Ideas in Business.