Coffee Chat Enthusiast Gifts

'My life began at 40 but my credit problems had a huge head start.'

'But, by not getting married, we've eliminated any chance of divorce.'

'I don't care what he says, child labor laws were never intended to protect the rights of children in their mid-30s.'

'I think it's getting serious between George and me. He doesn't text me anymore. He calls me on the phone.'

Wilberforce broke off our engagement, but he is willing to see me as a patient.

'The worst part about marriage is the unpaid overtime.'

'Herb wasn't the only fish in the sea, but so far all I've met are sharks and octopus.'

A cup of coffee with Evelyn usually turned into unsolicited analysis.

'The rat race isn't so bad, if you marry the right rat.'

"I've been dating this homeless guy..."

"I accept it's over between us, but must you refer to me as 'a former subject of interest'?"

"Oh sure, I've had multiple orgasms...I had one in 1999 and one in 2004!"

"I'm dating a much younger guy....makes sense, my ex was a cheetah."

"I wouldn't want it to be widely known, but Jeff and I are happy in all the major domains of life."

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

'The efficiency expert's recommendation is we drink more coffee!'

"I drink just enough coffee to make me think I can do my job."

"Give me all the caffeine you have."

'I need to talk to you about the coffee fund.'

'Pretty strange term, market share, considering the whole object is not to.'

'Note to self: Like coffee, homemade coffee wine should be available in decaf, too.'

Countervailing Clichés.

"Yuppies! There goes the hood!"

Non-Power Breakfast

"I'll have another Rob Roy and a cup of coffee for my friend here."

"In accordance with our new 'sharing of responsibilities initiative,' you'll all be responsible for getting my coffee." i

"Right now it's between you and two hundred and fifty other people who came to Seattle, moved in with five roommates, joined a band, took a job in a coffee bar, got fed up, had a meeting with themselves, and decided it was time to go out and find a real job."

EU and India partnership.

'Coffee must wear you out. They're always sleepy when they drink it.'

Raphnrrf? Raphnrrf? Umpha? Frfee? Maamr? Pick.

Pull an all-nighter?

'After sex he checks his cell phone messages.'

"You sure you guys don't spike the coffee?"

"We love each other very much, and we concur on alcohol and coffee. But we're unable to come to an agreement on meat and fish."