Cocktail Genius T-Shirts

"Do you know how to make a fly-juice Martini?"

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

"This place has the best happy hour."

A Good Batch.

On holiday.

I could have danced all night!

"Another dry scotch Manhattan, Mike. Make it a double."

Cocktails on the verandah.

'No ice.'

"What do you recommend for someone being tried in absentia?"

'Steak Ted?'

Party Animals.

Cat Nip.

Join me in a Martini?

"I just realized you're my entire entourage."

'No standing while room is in motion.'

Pina Coladas

We'll have Manhattans...

"I think I speak for my entire generation when I say, 'Yes, I will have another drink.' "

"Drunk, yet orderly"

Balancing two espresso martinis

Dickens & Tolstoy Walk into a Bar: " . . . so, to make a short story long . . . "

Shaken not stirred

"Think we'll still make happy hour?"

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

"I love this time of day."

You're the botanicals in my gin

"She'll have a Shirley Temple, and I'll have a Shirley Temple's mother."

"Damn those dugout Martinis!"

"An everything Martini, please."

Bar snacks served in bird-feeders.

"Death Star? Is that in the Valley?"

In case of emergency, break glass.

"From right to left, you have your tekkamaki, your futomaki, and then your yamaimo roll. The little pile of pink stuff is ginger, the green one's wasabi. And, of course, you already recognize your vodka martini."

Margarita