Cocktail Commentary T-Shirts

"Lost a step? Hell, no. Those young zebras are juiced."

Cocktails on the verandah.

On holiday.

"What do you recommend for someone being tried in absentia?"

Cat Nip.

We'll have Manhattans...

Pina Coladas

"I think I speak for my entire generation when I say, 'Yes, I will have another drink.' "

"An everything Martini, please."

Balancing two espresso martinis

"Damn those dugout Martinis!"

You're the botanicals in my gin

"She'll have a Shirley Temple, and I'll have a Shirley Temple's mother."

Dickens & Tolstoy Walk into a Bar: " . . . so, to make a short story long . . . "

Bar snacks served in bird-feeders.

In case of emergency, break glass.

"From right to left, you have your tekkamaki, your futomaki, and then your yamaimo roll. The little pile of pink stuff is ginger, the green one's wasabi. And, of course, you already recognize your vodka martini."

Margarita

"I love these off-site business meetings."

I've decided to shift down a few gears.'

"I'll have another Rob Roy and a cup of coffee for my friend here."

Espresso Martini Peacock

"I don't know anything about art, but this is a damned good Martini."

I'm freshwater. Make it a margarita without salt.

Woman at spa having bath in a Martini cocktail glass.

Adam and Eve toast next to a serpent bartender.

"You know what they say, time flies when you're having rum!"

'You deserve some unabashed fun once in a while.'

You're the olive in my martini

Baloneystini

"If it's my pride, I'm not here"

"Well, what are you doing after the millennium?"

Cocktail glasses swimming in the sea.

The Martini is invented.

'Actually, I don't get out much. I spend most of my time alone, writing lyrical novels celebrating nature and the interconnectedness of all living things!'