Clumsiness Aficionado Gifts

Glass and Porcelain Store: Elephants must remain outside.

'Can I help it if I was given two left feet?'

'Do you still wonder why you were passed over for accounting research manager?'

The Fall of Gnome

"Yes, it's a sports related injury. He dropped his bowling ball."

A polar bear has slipped and is sprawled out on the ice next to a yellow caution sign that features a slipping figure.

Baldo's How to Be Uncool: No. 5. Forget how hot the coffee is while you're thinking how cool you look sitting in a coffee shop.

Man carrying crates of eggs about to step on sleeping dog.

'Guess who I bumped into today? EVERYBODY!'

'The mind-body problem is best expressed in the formulation...OOf!'

"I'm here because I keep bumping into old friends. Like, literally bumping into them."

Man reading letter, 'You may already be a winner' about to step on rake.

"Oh my God Ruth, it's that bull again!"

Cat in bandages and on a crutch.

'When I get the clumsies, switch me to a sippy-cup.'

Caution: Wet Floor

'You know, this is the second bottle of this I've opened, and I still have no idea what it tastes like.'

'Darn it, Marvin! Can't you do anything right?'

Man carrying lots of brushes is about to trip over one.

'How can you be so clumsy, Fred? That's the third time today you've tripped in the sand!'

'Little help here?'

Quick-sand

'To be honest, I'm surprised you employed me!'

'Be reasonable, Daphne - It's the only thing I've broken during the whole course of our marriage!'

Stick Man/Schtick Man

"Here's to a clean start ..."

"Maybe it would be best if you waited out here."

Cold Cruel World: If a guy smashes his finger and there's nobody around will he actually make any noise?

"Oops, sorry."

Man hitting himself in the head with a hammer.

Seems like that always happens when you're wearing white, right?

"Man...it's totally hard to look cool without a car."

"I'm afraid you're not cut out for precision assembly work. You're all thumbs."

Summersault/Wintersault.

'Do you have this in nine wide, two left feet?'