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The latest fall fashion trends

Nigel was well pleased with his new tank-top...

"That one is non-wash. Also no ironing is required."

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

'She dressed herself this morning.'

'...so I simply combined my love of beards with my love of tattoos and this was the result!'

"Like my new haircut?"

'This was designed for people who have mastered easy chairs and want to attempt something more difficult.'

Heloise's Helpful Hints for Homebound

"You can't quit my bridal fashion business. It says so in the prenup, I man the non-compete agreement!"

'It's better than we expected. Now the sheep produce wool in the winter and cotton in the summer.'

'He doesn't seem to like my haircut.'

"Nice. Got this in camo?"

Caveman applying wallpaper cave paintings

"It's expensive because it connects to the internet."

"Anyone who laughs at my new haircut will be subjected to immediate termination."

"I've upcycled your magazines into an ottoman."

'Welcome home, dear. While you were away I redecorated...'

"Would you believe I can still fit into my tux after eighteen years?"

'I ran into a whittler.'

'Why are you putting laundry soap into the proton anti-matter warp drive engine?'

"I don't really have the skirt for this blouse."

Mutant Mootunes - Pete Poodle Pants

'...and all of our power suits come with a complimentary surge protector.'

"With all this wearable tech, I wish they'd come up with a smart belt."

e-procurement

Gals! Are you entering you 'goddess' years?

Unusual Washing Line

A man on a desert island fashions a bikini for himself.

A short legged lady bug is among long legged ones.

Do you have a larger suit in the same size?

I've found the designer gene.

'I think of it as mending pants, not splicing jeans.'

"It's all marketing - no one actually wears that stuff."

'Sure I submitted somebody else's resum? - I'm the victim of a stolen identity.'