Sartorial Innovator T-Shirts

'What's next? Shoes we can walk in??'

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

'...so I simply combined my love of beards with my love of tattoos and this was the result!'

'She dressed herself this morning.'

"Like my new haircut?"

Heloise's Helpful Hints for Homebound

'This was designed for people who have mastered easy chairs and want to attempt something more difficult.'

"You can't quit my bridal fashion business. It says so in the prenup, I man the non-compete agreement!"

'He doesn't seem to like my haircut.'

Caveman applying wallpaper cave paintings

"Anyone who laughs at my new haircut will be subjected to immediate termination."

Man in a Tuxedo

'Now that's what I call a beautiful fit.'

"It's expensive because it connects to the internet."

"Nice. Got this in camo?"

'Welcome home, dear. While you were away I redecorated...'

"Would you believe I can still fit into my tux after eighteen years?"

"It's not so much a 'power' suit anymore – it's more of an 'happy to be employed' ensemble."

'I ran into a whittler.'

"That one is non-wash. Also no ironing is required."

'...and all of our power suits come with a complimentary surge protector.'

"I don't really have the skirt for this blouse."

"It's powered by clean hydroelectricity from Norwegian fjords and built from 100% recycled shopping bags. We call it the Smugmobile!"

His mane bun is just so wrong.

"With all this wearable tech, I wish they'd come up with a smart belt."

Mutant Mootunes - Pete Poodle Pants

Butterfly Bow-tie.

e-procurement

Gals! Are you entering you 'goddess' years?

A man on a desert island fashions a bikini for himself.

"Of course I'm young at heart...I had one of my wrinkles pierced, didn't I?"

Having shrewdly grabbed a window fan to bulk up his shirt, Winston hoped his buff look would land him a date.

I've found the designer gene.

Cornrows

'I think of it as mending pants, not splicing jeans.'