Clothes Shopping Champ Gifts

Fitting Rooms and Nothing Fits Room

'It's nothing serious. Rest is the best cure for binge shopping.'

I thought you said Megson couldn't be bought.

'My diet seems to be working great! Do you have any less relaxed jeans?'

"The only thing that's not gone up is the pound."

'I love shopping for clothing I don't need with money I don't have.'

"The Box is bigger, the contents smaller, increased the price and called it improved."

"Go with the horizontal stripes. It'll make me look thinner when I stand next to you."

Notice: this dress will be out of style by January 2009.

Orderly Conduct of Sales

How would Madam like to pay?

'Let me through - I've a bargain for a nose!'

"The checkout clerk will now testily remind you to press 'ok'."

STRIP Hambone: Expensive repair job

'So the prince and princess lowered their expectations became savvy consumers, then they lived reasonably contented forever after.'

"My husband said, 'We were getting low' on the essentials!"

Checkout for $385.00 or more.

'I hear voices again! Buy! Buy! Buy!'

Retro Fashions door sign reads 'Out to lunch -back before you know it.'

I'm sorry, they don't make dresses large on the inside and small on the outside!

'My wife doesn't just allow for inflation - she helps it along.'

Tescos: 'Oh no! There's no chocolate at the checkout!'

"Most of it is the same, but if you look here you'll see that the price is twice as big"

'Going into business sale' at a jeweler's.

"I want my back-to-school clothes to be stylish yet practical...comfortable yet rugged...something that says Gracie Bermudez!"

'You're the first person to ask for a shopping hour in addition to a lunch hour.'

'That's Jeb Lambert. He was actually the first one to say 'paper or plastic'. Before that everyone said 'plastic or paper'... I mean, can you imagine?'

"People seem to be saying, Christmas is early, much earlier than they did last year."

'Cleanup on Aisle 4.'

"Maybe they should call it 'in the red' Friday."

You Can Afford 8 Less Products Each Week

"Of course I'm familiar with crop tops. It's just the crop bottoms, not so much."

'Hi, yourself.'

'I'll take it!'

"Do you have something that says, 'Quit stalking me'?"