Closet Confessor Gifts

"I just have this unmistakeable urge to come out."

'...when did you first get these feelings of wanting to be a psychiatrist?'

Shoe addict.

"You won't believe this but I haven't a thing to wear"

'Please forgive me for anything I've said or left unsaid.'

Maria had always said you could never have too many shoes. Actually, she was wrong.

Hat Boxes, in the Closet

"I have a whole closet full of running clothes I never wear."

A woman and her home simultaneously achieve 'casual'.

"It's all show-as soon as Marks gone he switches off the football and reads Proust..."

"How many capsule wardrobes is this again?"

Time to put away your presents. I don't have room. You said you "needed" a new jacket. I do! My old one's too small. Donate it. I would. But I can't get it out of my closet.

Closet.

It's too hard to clean my closet. Take out everything. Throw them into "keep", "donate" or "toss" boxes. Ok. Done!

'This closet needs digitized.'

'And this is the walk-in clos..' - 'We'll take it!!'

'Stick on Souls'

Monk confessing to a devil.

"Oh, I love this! The huge walk-in closet comes with it's own master bedroom!"

'I guess you'd call it a queer request. He wants his ashes put in a fruit jar and hidden in the closet.'

"Harold is a closet intellectual and he's never coming out."

Honey?! Can you bring up two crowbars to Twig's room? What for? She needs help. Mo-om! You're being extreme. Done! You've got plenty of space to hang your new Christmas clothes. Ok. I'll clean out my closet. Our work is done!

'I can't find my camouflage jacket.'

'I've been talking to my imaginary friend Carlos about this, and he thinks you're the wrong doctor to treat my delusional syndrome.'

'Now, are you looking for a closet or something under a bed?'

'Good to see you in church on Sunday.' -'So that's where I was.'

The cat got his owner's tongue, and is letting him know why.

"Bless me, Father, for I have wind."

'I'm heart-broken, Steven's Dad sold his sweet shop.'

'Do you like my new dress dear?' (Price reads - An arm and a leg)

'Padre, if I told you, then I would have to kill you.'

"You really need to get rid of these clothes if you want to stop being mistaken for a historical re-enactor."

'Your car keys are under the sofa, and you like to wear women's shoes.'

"I see...and where was this carpet?"

"Does my overdraft look big in this?"