Clinic Jester Pillows

'I believe in delegating nonprofessional duties. In my place the technicians sell the leashes and rubber bones!'

CLINIC, 'Are you worried about passing your blood test?', 'Heck, no -- anybody can BLEED.'

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

"And as soon as he's on the mend,we'll get the physiotherapist in here with a ball of twine."

"We're following Carrot Top."

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

'How's everyone doing tonight - that is the question.'

'How about a game of cards?'

"I always check twitter before work, to see if yesterday's joke got me the sack."

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

"Not guilty but prepared to settle out of court, your honour."

'Wait!... I don't want to take Brady out right now. He's just getting into rhythm.'

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

'Your Honor, in order to avoid being sued, we find the defendant 'Not guilty.''

'This court finds you guilty Mr. Jones. As your punishment, the bailiff here will slug you one.'

"#notguilty."

'Can I sue someone because I didn't win my lawsuit?'

Stepping on clown's shoe...

Yawning barristers in court

A baby in court

"I say we move on to dessert."

Basketball.

'I couldn't help noticing that nobody swore YOU in!'

'Make him laugh, make him cry.'

"Dave here, is a lawyer. But don't be too impressed, he only specialises in petty crime."

'Don't worry boss, it's probably archaic!'

'Cut down on sodium? I'm taking that with a pinch of salt.'

'Court is in recess for one hour. Everyone convene on the playground and we will choose sides for dodgeball!'

"We can give you enough medication to alleviate the pain, but not enough to make it fun."

"I give up. Where's the patient?'

'My client has required the services of countless law enforcement, court, penal and probation personnel. He's not a menace...he's a jobs creator!'