Climate Control Aficionado Gifts

Slam!

"Now, I'm ready for summer."

Scarcity

Global Warming.

"The tuna is endangered, the lettuce was recalled and the tomatoes were hit by a drought. I can give you mayo on a roll."

'I don't give advice. I'm only up here because it's safer.'

'Sales meltdown...global warming...coincidence? I think not!'

"We've had too much rain - they don't have enough - we'll sell our rain and make millions!"

'It looks like we might get some rain ahead.'

'Well, shoot. Now Uncle Hector's caught in the ice! It's enough to make you want to move to Florida.'

"I'm the bluebird of PMS. Fetch me some decaf and turn on the air conditioner. I'm burning up in here!"

"Business has picked up since we introduced short term cryogenic stays for the football off season."

'I have an open-door policy, but only until the air conditioner is repaired.'

'I don't know who's cranking up the air conditioning out here, but knock it off!'

'Turn up the air conditioning. Panting always puts us at a disadvantage during negotiations.'

'Congratulations on winning Weather Forecaster of the Year, you rotten swine!'

"The cause of your illness is the approaching winter."

"It's so hard to settle on a office temperature that everybody likes."

Corn Price Denialism

'Honey, I'm looking fat in white!' 'Trust me, dear. In a few months, the pounds will be melting away.'

Now do you believe in global warming?!

You're right. Winter in Florida sounds better every year.

'California: Here I come!'

Greta's Scream (after Munch)

'Eiter global warming is accelerating, or my Google map with climate information is malfunctioning.'

"You sure you don't wanna turn the AC down just a tad?"

'Of course some species have responded better to global warming than others.'

Overheated office where a member of staff is suffering from high temperatures

"Of course some species have adapted better than others to climate change..."

Taking the wrong road to the future - the environment crisis

"Hear me out. Maybe rising sea levels wouldn't be so bad."

Scientists discovered an immense hole in Siberia. Nobody knows what caused it. Some think global warming melted a huge, gas-filled hill made of ice so fast that is exploded. Let's let them go on thinking that, little buddy. House of Java.net Cybercafe. By the way, if you ever go out to the middle of nowhere to brew your own black market cologne, make sure you don't brew it on a hill made of ice. That does not constitute an admission of anything.

A Present form Saudi Arabia.

'I do wish you'd stop playing with the climate control Hazel!'

"Now over to the weather desk for a detailed report."