Clever Chef T-Shirts

"Pretend you're a zombie and the cauliflower is a brain."

Cloud Cuckoo Land, Hamburger bar, "I don't like the look of this Charlie"

Frank & Ernie's Diner. Special: Scrabbled Eggs. No, sir, it's not a misprint -- Ernie adds alphabet soup.

Children's Feast.

Elfian lady grilling on mushroom: 'Summertime in the Enchanted Forest'.

Recipes from The Lying Gourmet

'Muriel's philosophy is that what happens in the kitchen, stays in the kitchen.'

The Origins of Everything

Baloneystini

Better Not Squash.

All-Candy Seder.

"I hope you're not using any of the canned food I so diligently stockpiled.

Tzatzikicicle

"I'm starving! How long will dinner be?"

Writer and his Muse on a cookout.

Picasso

'And it comes with oven mitts, butter, sour cream and chives.'

Sushi Train Set.

"The tiny red things were harvested from Frankie's bonsai tree."

Spatula Conductor

Christmas Canapes

"And he's a nutritional-support animal, too."

Artist and chiken

Noodle exchange program.

'Now where did I put my knitting needles?'

Football Pudding

Who wants to lick the swatters.

Sushi For Men...

Wife at breakfast: 'We're out of sugar - how about chocolate milk on your cereal?'

"For the next Christmas party pot luck, let's skip the finger foods."

Roger wouldn't prepare any meal without first consulting his pie chart.

'Carrot cake!.. What's next?.. Broccoli cake?'

"She'll only eat it if I cut it up in cloverleaf shapes, serve it on a blue plate, and do a little dance as I serve it."

'I'm short of ingredients. What's a good substitute for filet mignon?'

'These are exquisite! You simply must give me your recipe.'