Clerical Assistant Gifts

"...We've clubbed together to get you something as a token of our appreciation. I think the staples are included."

I've always wanted to quit while I was ahead but the opportunity never presented itself.

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

A paperwork machine spews endless paperwork

Whats ticking away in YOUR filing system?

'I'll be late for dinner, dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

"Staff support"

"Give a sh*t" "Don't give a sh*t"

IN box...OUT is wastepaper basket on fire.

In/Out/These Things Happen.

Desk trays - 'in', 'out', and 'one of these days'.

'I'll be late for dinner, dear, I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

Storm in the out tray

37 years in the same position.

'T.M.I.F.'

"I think I'll be late back for tea. . . about a week."

'Apparently, Smith's desk just couldn't withstand the weight of the paperwork we piled on his desk.'

"Morning, all!"

'Today is the tomorrow I feared yesterday. . .'

"If you'd only come to me sooner I wouldn't have had to go to lunch."

In many ways this is the perfect job! Out. Out.

Organization is not rocket science!

"What do you want to talk about first...the kleptomania or the hoarding?"

'Please put that confusing mess of documents, files and folders where it belongs...in your computer.'

'You'll soon get the hang of it - then they'll change it.'

'I have much less stress since I replaced my in box with a paper shredder.'

'So what do you think of my report, sir?'

He avoids wrath, envy, lust, greed, gluttony and sloth -- the problem is he's proud of it!

Shake it all about sign on desk

"No, kid, we don't call these 'attachment icons.' We call them paperclips."

Inout baskets.

Late/Too Late.

In and Out Tray

"My husband is taking me on a cruise, so I’m looking for a book that will help me forget that I’m on a cruise with my husband."

'It's only fair to warn you that if you get the job there would be a lot of filing involved.'