Cleanliness Conversationalist Gifts

"What do you say we get out of here and go someplace less contagious?"

"You're very lucky that gazelle gives me diarrhea."

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

Santa Claus's wife beats the soot out of his beard.

"Your children are adorable...and so shiny!" "Thanks. I them in dish detergent."

Dogs shaving

Struggling with issues from his own childhood, the Bedroom Bandit would sneak in and jumble children's room across the nation. Not a mother believed it.

"I just cleaned that glass! How can it already be covered in nose prints?!"

'If you can keep him clean for a day you can sleep in his bed tonight.'

'I just finished the floors, so they better stay clean!'

Al puts tiny diapers on his fish.

"Ma'am, you don't have an ant problem. They're coffee grounds."

"Before you go anywhere, did you lick behind your ears?"

'I know my instruments are sterilized every day but I have no idea who does it.'

"I was wrong. Apparently, it wasn't our kids who used all my bubble bath."

In the art gallery

"Teddy, you call this a 'clean room'?"

"I'm guessing you're a germaphobe?"

Spring Cleaning

The glass is half full. - '' - 'The glass is half empty' - '' - 'Gah!! No clean glasses!!' - '' -

"How do you know it's my leaves clogging the shower drain?"

'No we didn't get high definition TV - the wife dusted the screen.'

"I tidied away all the cushions and stuffed toy animals. It appears we never had a bed."

"If a tree falls in the forest and no-one hears it.".... "Then your illegal logging business is a success."

Man brushing the teeth of his reflection.

'The Anal Retentive Astronaut.' 'Just LOOK at all this DUST!'

"Sorry, but it is not negotiable! You have to let Tim clean your teeth twice a day!"

Jesus as a child - 'Just look at my clean floor! What have I told you about walking on puddles?'

"Think it can last 20 seconds this time?"

Junior's Towel