Cleaning Comrade Gifts

"Hey, kid, need any dust?"

'Create Adam before Eve -- He'll need some time to clean up around there a little first.'

"For goodness sake George - I only asked you to clean the oven!"

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

"Bad dog."

'Life is all attitude: 45 seconds of enjoying it...45,000 hours of regretting it...'

'I go to St. Patrick's Church, I go to St. Patrick's School, and my name is Patrick. Is it also necessary for me to eat green food?'

'Before you come with me, tell me...does this robe look a little rumpled to you? I don't think the dry cleaners got the creases out, do you?'

Ironing day.

Cats are under tremendous peer pressure to remain useless.

Musical Accompaniment to Household Chores.

The household cavalry

Fumes from furniture

"It would kill him to run a vacuum?"

'It isn't supposed to taste good. It's furniture polish.'

This is not what I had in mind when I joined the Council!

Cook and Octopus

"I don't CARE if Tracy Emin's bed sold for £4440,000...I STILL want you to clean your room."

'How many times have I told you to stay out of the cemetery?'

'No, Mrs. Dudley! If there's a bone in a chair, that means it's reserved for Marmaduke!'

'When you've finished the washing up and you're certain you've cleaned absolutely everything... you'll always find another teaspoon.'

"I could probably keep spring-cleaning till next winter."

"Let me know when the floor is clean enough for me to put my feet on it again."

'Mom, I cleaned my room like you told me.'

Man of steel wool.

'Since he stopped smoking, he doesn't know what to do with his mouth.'

Cleaner

'Don't worry about the dishes. I did them.'

'Oh no, green waxy build up.'

Giant sandwich bags.

'It doesn't look good, sir - the enemy is amassing vacuum cleaners along our southern border.'

"You'll have to clean your room by yourself. Your plea for disaster aid has been turned down by the President."

'How damp is this place? Let me put it this way: I use mold and mildew remover as a skin care product.'

That's what I call a well trained dog!!

'Quick! 'Tushy to the ground' stance!'