Clean Comedy Enthusiast Gifts

Hell - "You can say what you like about this place.. At least they keep it clean."

Things my vacuum likes to suck up

Water company bonus.

"Ma'am, you don't have an ant problem. They're coffee grounds."

"How do you know it's my leaves clogging the shower drain?"

'Good, lots of waxy buildup.'

'Don't worry about the dishes. I did them.'

'How damp is this place? Let me put it this way: I use mold and mildew remover as a skin care product.'

'After this my bath water will never seem the same!'

'Congratulations, Hightower. You now lead the league in untainted urine samples.'

'...it's probably blood on the boardroom carpet.'

"Has anyone fed the goldfish?"

Carpet cleaning

'...Then I swept down the staircase, into the ballroom.'

"We think he picked it up at the kennel."

'If you two don't mind, I need my mop.'

"Stop using math to make me look bad."

"You have no idea what I've been through."

Mrs. Bortluber saves all the gunk she cleans from her computer.

'You talk about a clean dog!'

Priest reading 'Confessions of a Window Cleaner'.

'I'll see the ones with clean underwear first.'

"So what? Germs are also invisible!"

Witch on broom followed by witch on hangglider dustpan

"I can skip my bath tonight. I put the windows down when Dad drove through the carwash."

"When I told you to change your socks... I didn't mean from one foot to another!"

"Your shirt's on inside out."

Cotton Buds.

'Take no notice of Nigel, he just finds alternative comedy incredibly amusing!'

Scruffy man on desert island has written in the sand 'Help!! Need make grooming products.'

"During the operation I had a true out-of-body experience and I have to tell you, there is a lot of dust on top of those lights."

"There's sewage in the rivers, there's sewage in the lakes. We'd be right at home living in the country."

Janitor on the Job Training.

'Well, I got that nasty stain out of the carpet!'