Claw Machine Champion T-Shirts

"And thus the hunters become the hunted."

Alien Arcade

Playing an arcade machine

'Wow...Your work is amazing!'

"Must get a longer cable."

Unbeknownst to many, the Frankenstein legend was in fact based on Albert Grimes, the mad tree surgeon.

"C'mon! C'mon! Almost there..."

'It's a beautiful lighthouse. However, hauling the batteries up the stairs has taken its toll on my back.'

"Nostalgia is one helluva drug."

'Thank you for noticing, Shirley - but beauty comes at a price, It hampers my hunting, limits my berry picking and typing's a real pain,'

Robotic man mowing the lawn

Lumberjack:'TIMBERRRR!' Tree:'MURDERERRRR!'

'I don't care if they are cheaper...we're not using them!'

'I wonder how many board feet are in this tree.'

Claw Machine Head

'I got this one from my son who made it at camp.'

"Did you know that cats can give paw?"

"He's got steady hands and was the top recruit from Funzone."

"I'm going to knock you on your Axe!!"

You B*****D

Pinterest shaming

"Nope. Looks like we're gonna have to use the saw on this one, too."

'You do nice work!'

'Chainsaw Championships.'

Banana Arcade Game

"Her name is 'Precious', but her nickname is 'why we can't have nice things.'"

"Trimmed, but not so much that I can't claw up the furniture."

'We don't own a shredder. We just hang sensitive material on the furniture and let the cat take care of it.'

Claw Machine

"I should've known if we told him we were going to have him declawed he'd go out with a bang."

Never give up! Unless it's really h.....

"Isn't that cute? She bought herself a little stool to sit on and watch us shred her chairs!"

An oxymoron: Cat optimist

"No guilt! This is the price they areed tp pay for a shot at our mercurial affections."

'We need to get him a scratching post.'