Classroom Hacker Gifts

'I think Benjamin like me. He linked my homepage to his homepage.'

'As a beginning teacher, you know you come here prepared to teach and become a good teacher. As you gain experience, you will learn that you also come here to care and become a great teacher.'

"It's no my fault I got a D. The system is broken."

"The cat told me to eat your homework."

''C-minus'? ??" Do you know how long it took me to find and download this term paper?'

Gadget geek.

"Get up at 7; leave for school by 8; no video games until after homework is done -- how about some regulatory relief?"

'I didn't write the book report. I downloaded and printed it directly from the Internet, but I did collate and staple it myself.'

"Thanks for considering me for the job as head of cybersecurity, but I already hacked into your network and gave myself the job."

'I don't think my homework is very good. My dog refused to eat it.'

"If animals can be cloned, why can't homework be cloned?"

'I didn't read that scene, but I did highlight several passages.'

"Never marry an engineer."

"I hacked into Santa's computer and added a few gifts. It pays to have computer skills."

'I accidentally hacked into Mom's microwave oven.'

Teacher to student: 'Nice use of glitter, but you were assigned to do math problems.'

'Now, now...no stealing people's data until you finish your brussels sprouts.'

'What do you mean that you hacked into Old Faithful's computer so now it's not so faithful?'

"How was first grade? I don't know yet. I spent all day in the Principal's office."

"Please, Ms. Sweeney, may I ask where you're going with all this?"

I will not waste chalk kid...

"Sure I remember you. I'm terrible with faces but I never forget a username, pin or password."

2000 words was tough, but doable. Billy would play the picture paints a 1000 words card, twice!

"No, I don't believe Michaelangelo ever did any bobbleheads."

Changing the Lightbulb.

'You did your book report on the TV schedule?'

"Sorry, class, but because of new deregulations, I don't have to teach you anything this year."

'I'm sorry, Sally, you can't buy a vowel.'

'No, fear isn't one of the basic taste sensations.'

STRIP Hambone: "System been down long?"

"Will this global warming mean we'll have longer summer vacations?"

'Teddy, someone from the Pentagon wants to talk to you about drones in Pakistan, whatever that means.'

"Mrs. Martin is here. She's the new substitute teacher."

'Don't ask questions, Margaret -- Just get Bill Gates on the phone!'