Classroom Assistant Gifts

"I'm rooted in humanism but today was a rough day so for a little extra support in managing my class, I put on my intimidating face."

A Puppet Named Juan

'From six to to eighteen, they're always at that age.'

'As a beginning teacher, you know you come here prepared to teach and become a good teacher. As you gain experience, you will learn that you also come here to care and become a great teacher.'

"If a third grader knows the answer, how much of a problem can it really be?"

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

'Okay, is there anybody else whose homework ate their dog?'

'Good girl, Carol - now hands up all those who have lost their pens.'

'I started out as a teacher's pet, and then it kind of snowballed.'

'Smashing party, Miss - can we have another one tomorrow?'

'Your classroom management techniques work in practice but not in theory. That worries me.'

'Who I played in Summer Stock.'

'The reason the core curriculum seems so ambiguous is that we dot really have a core curriculum.'

"If something that doesn't kill me only makes me stronger, then I should be Atlas!"

"Graduation day at kite flying school."

'This handheld computer is very useful for teaching. It displays my lesson plan, calander, key files, and an extensive menu of put-downs for hecklers and classroom clowns.'

'Thank you for the apple Conrad. But in answer to your question, no, you may not address me as 'Boopsie'.'

'My class is so large and my seat so far back, I feel like I'm taking a distance-learning course.'

'While outsourcing is a common business practice, you may not ousource your research and homework assignments, Fletcher.'

"If you do well in your first practicum, you can move on to teaching real children."

"I've heard of being organized, but isn't this a little obsessive compulsive?"

"I passed the three R's. Now I need some R and R!"

'Life isn't fair and neither is Miss Brown!'

Teacher getting the childrens attention by pretending to be on television.

Too much homework: kid with two backpacks.

"She's a high grade teacher."

'You can't blame the kids for being restless when we have math teachers teaching French, and English teachers teaching science.'

Education Guidance

"Things happen so fast. What's news when class starts is history when it ends."

The History Teacher

Luck is when good classroom management skills meets a day when distruptice students are absent.

"Of course, that's only a first draft."

I'm in the den mom, reading the newspaper for social studies class.

Help. High performing teacher trapped in low performing pay scale.

Global Education