Classical Techie Gifts

Concerto in DOS for Microsoft Windows.

Ascent of Machine.

"No, our home wasn't stolen. Since it's a 'smart home', it keeps having itself moved to a nice neighborhood."

"Invest in technology."

Video Henge: made from melting and molding 3,000,000 obsolete VCR tapes.

"Since he got that thing, he mostly just kills time."

Gadget geek.

'Someday TVs will be in big boxes on the floor.'

"I do tech support for the cloud."

If Disney was a software company

"Did you notice how the cables never get tangled!"

All the apps hidden within a phone

"Okay lets go. You can message your friends after dinner."

'Yeah, I'm a mouser.'

Boombox

'For the luxury item I'd like my ipod.'

Master Artists' Computer Graphics: Michelangelo's 'God's Creation of the Adam Computer.'

I've always been slower than computers...

"I have an app for that."

I demand to be recompensed for the 28.47 minutes of my time your café was wasted. What? There are 1500 square feet of seating space in this café. That is room enough for 125 people. 90 percent of Americans own a personal electronic device of some sort. The quotient of that ratio of people to electronic devices is 112.5. Dividing by two produces a quotient of 56.25. So you see, it's obvious why you owe me compensation for my wasted time. I have no idea what you're saying. You only have 55 electri

"All I'm saying is now is the time to develop the technology to deflect an asteroid."

'Everyone's in a rush these days!'

'A loaf of bread, a jug of wine, a CD player, a laptop computer, a cordless phone and thou.'

"WIFI, Amazon, credit cards. Pretty much every password is named after me."

Passions flared. It was like they had some sort of powerful,cross-platform,internal wireless connection going on.

Jim unwittingly wanders into a rough section of the Computer Science department.

"For the last time...I'm Alexa, not Siri! Get it right, moron!"

"Der, dad. . . it's wireless!"

For our eco-night entertainment we have Kim's "Dance Against Global Warming," Zahir's "Rap for the Eco Cure" and Twig's "Post-Carbon Poetry Slam." How about you, Jason? I'll explain metal organic vapor deposition in solar panels. Well! We'll see who's into heavy metal.

The Uses of a Stethoscope

Statue of liberty selfie

"I'm just gonna do one more set."

"Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow, creeps in this pretty pace from day to day. To the last syllable of recorded time. . ."

The Final Chapter.

"There was a time when I used to instil absolute terror into everybody..."