Classic Tech Struggler Gifts

"He's so used to his phone calculating his tip, he forgot how to do it himself. His phone died, so he's been sitting there for over an hour trying to figure it out."

Computer Room.

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

"This next one is a typical blues number about exceeding your data plan limit, cracking your ipad screen, and losing your new ear buds."

'Sorry, I can't help you, the computer's down again.'

"Sorry for the wait, our computers are down. We have to do everything manually."

Tech Support/Counseling for Anxiety caused by tech-support.

'...please switch of all mobile phones, paging devices and alarm watches...'

'Oh great, a machine with an attitude.'

Concerto in DOS for Microsoft Windows.

"Problem?"

'Sounds good! -- Have your beeper beep my beeper!'

Members of the Luddite community carving computers from solid blocks of oak and maple

Caveman wheel repairers.

"Huh, I've spent weeks trying to figure this out, and all I had to do was push that little button. She's on now though boy! Look at her go!"

Desktop Print Hell: '...an eternity of different printers and no windows driver...'

"Judging by all the hair you've pulled out of your head, I must be hard to teach technology to than I thought."

'Sorry guys! But i'm afraid we're going to have to shoot this segment again. The darn tape just ran out!'

The copier is making a whining noise.

"I'm certainly no expert on the matter, but throwing the copier out the window just may be a sign you're suffering from stress."

I hate blind carbon copies when the computers are down.

STRIP Hambone: Techinical support in layman's terms #2

'I see the printer is acting up again.'

"They call it the Cloud. No wonder I Can't find anything in it."

'Your Dell went to hell.'

"Your computer crashed? Speaking of crashes..."

'...and we've converted this room into a home office.'

The smartphone app learning curve

"We are currently experiencing an unusually high volume of calls and all our advisers are busy..."

'Want to bet they're more VHS tapes when we've got a Beta System?'

"Who instructed Johnson to reboot his computer?"

"A glitch in production - everyone gets a prune omelette with sardines."

“Something’s wrong with my android.”

"If it makes you feel better...I usually don't understand what I'm doing either."

'Lord, NO! Take me instead!'