City Vacation Gifts

"Have you got any after ten tours for people who never get up before eight-thirty?"

"Tight......this isn't tight...now a New York City apartment......that's tight."

'It's a chart of office morale. This is where you went on vacation.'

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

Tourists

Easter Island legs

'I'd say your caravan's a tad overloaded, sir.'

On holiday.

"The fish sticks here are very good."

'Why couldn't you just give him a bucket and shovel?'

"Hmm...well...It'll look better when it's finished...!"

Holiday time.

Beach con-man.

"Oooh... Look, honey. Scarlet macaws! You know, they mate for life." "That's what you think."

'Hold on just a few more minutes. I want mine medium well.'

'I think you're getting the hang of it.'

Bad fake tan day.

Club Antisocial

"I know I'm a little early, but sometimes I need a break from that dreadfully cold weather."

'Been Away?' A piece of bread looks at a piece of brown toast as if it's got a suntan.

"Mom! Your cell phone’s ringing ... it’s Dad!"

"This year we decided to vacation on the 3rd rock."

World Tour.

Viking on beach with rubber ring shaped like viking ship.

"Once upon a midnight dreary / while I pondered weak and weary."

"The woman on the fire escape who acted like it was a balcony"

Woman dreaming about being on vacation.

Happy kids running abount with a 'Schools out' banner

"Are we going for suntan, personal development or being the envy of our friends on Instagram?"

Working Holiday

'Couldn't you just bring a bucket and spade like other children?'

'Alone for the weekend at last!'

'Those bears are so cute I wish we could have brought them home.'

The end of summer is near and you still haven't made plans

I rather like bucket and spade holidays.