City Life Observers Gifts

Street beggar has a sign up table for his own credit card.

"Living in a city with functional infrastructure must be so boring."

"We're looking for that perfect blend of vision, ambition and ethical ambiguity."

'This country is on the road to ruin.' - 'Well, it'll never get there in this traffic.'

"The woman on the fire escape who acted like it was a balcony"

"Serendipity is not a strategy."

'Wentworth Street, Whitechapel'

"Bark bark bark bark bark" "Fwd: bark bark bark bark bark" "Fwd: fwd: bark bark bark bark bark" "Fwd: fwd: fwd: bark bark bark bark"

Mulching Vacuum Cleaner

"Legs together, David -- You're hamspreading again."

Terry had a computer bug.

'I'm looking for an assistant who knows my job, can do my job, but has no interest in having my job.'

"The end of my favorite series is near."

Domestic Spying Drones

Down on Bourbon Street...

'My salary increase got a few oo-hs.. but no ah-hs..'

When the Job Market Shifts, Always Remember That It's All Your Fault

"I've put every one of those vital master copies through here, and it took ages. Where do the copies come out?"

"Remember that requirement that you work without supervision? Forget it."

From Here You Can See Bugger All

You trip on it, you buy it.

'... Further to our telephone conversation of the 3rd, my fax of the 11th, my letters of the 16th, 23rd and 28th, my emails of....'

'Put simply, we need our website to tell consumers all about our company without really telling them anything about our company,'

The world of surveillance.

"I've got your letter in front of me now, sir."

Sooner or later, 'These trying times' become 'The good ol' days'.'

In case of panic, push button.

Sculptor explaining to tourist in Trafalgar Square that sculpture of pigeon is called 'Retribution - it actually doubles as a giant privy!'

Will Kill For Food

Jenkins! Why is it everything in this office is voice-activated except you?

'You cal it loyalty, we call it Stockholm Syndrome!'

'The problem is, you say no problem.'

Street: The Magazine for Homeless People

"Our generous pensions are unsustainable so I'm firing you."

"Please help! God struck me blind for not giving to a blind beggar."