Cinema Etiquette Crusader Pillows

George Appliances. That's right, this home theater system is co complete it even comes with a rude couple who sit behind you and guess the movie's plot twists.

Unfettered Corporate Campaigning.

First you're a law student, then you're a lawyer, then you're a judge, then you're a politician, then you're a criminal.

Planet of the Lawyers

"You're not a real fan. You're just dressed up like a slut for attention."

'Way too much information on your resume.'

Lady Justice wears a blindfold, but listens through headphones to a tape recorder on one of her scales.

"At least he's honest about it..."

"I'm pre-legal analysis."

"Your mom's not protesting sex and violence on TV...she's taking a stand against those early Christmas ads..."

'Watch what you admit to. He once tried to fine one of my clients for looking a gift horse in the mouth.'

Funny, this is the same pill the head of the price-gouging drug company needs to take so he can sleep at night, too. Pharmac …

'I'm suing my way alphabetically through the phone book.'

'While these products may not result in weight loss, they will result in credibility loss.'

When it comes to health issues, I'd rather listen to a physician than a spin doctor.

"What makes me a great attorney, as opposed to an adequate one? - My brother, the judge."

"'Ignorance of the law is no excuse.' Golly! I never heard that one! Did you ever hear that one?"

'Now that you've all had a chance to try the shampoo we would like you to fill in this questionnaire.'

Rupert Murdoch in the mud.

'Tragically, Mr. Cornwell was unable to afford a personal ethicist.'

"I'd like an aisle seat, please."

'Sir, we have a problem. The attorney section is totally overcrowded!' (demon to Satan)

Pay Cut for QCs: 'I put it to you that this strikes at the very foundations of justice!'

"He's not good with criticism."

Law school: 'Repeat after me, class 'sue 'em first, or be sued!'

'First time I've seen a law degree with an expiration date.'

'Remember, there's nothing to fear, except fear itself and costly litigation.'

'Have you not noticed that our legal department is crawling with lawyers!'

'What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer? A tick falls off you when you're dead.'

"My client has been convicted by the media, but I am confident that his conviction will be overturned on appeal by the three major networks and the 'Times.'"

'I put it to you that this strikes at the very foundations of justice!'

'Your fee is causing us more mental anguish than the accident.'

'I've done some of my best work pro bono ... darn it?'

"Actually, would you mind turning and shooting at 7 paces? Any more and you'll walk out of frame for my YouTube video."

The Verdict Is Union Yes!