Church Seeker Gifts

'We've reached very dry land, captain.'

"The kids love it, and it's saved my marriage."

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

"It's OK, I'm preordained."

"Why don't we switch off the news and give Brexit up for Lent?"

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

"I wish I had her jewelry." "I wish I had his wife." "I wish I had her figure." "I wish I had his money."

'Where would you recommend for a tech-free experience.'

Bless me father, for I have sinned...my brother did it.'

Early Piety

"Desmond likes to live in the moment. . . and that moment happens to be 1960."

Dog in Daisys

Cactus seats.

"To be honest, I don't mind the cold, and being an introvert, and slightly antisocial, I really treasure the quiet time when the others have flown south..."

'I love it here. It really floats my boat.'

'So it's with a heavy heart that I leave you good people of St. Paul's and accept the calling to be minister at the Sunnydell Nudist Colony...'

"I hate it when we fight."

"Whose idea was it to start with the Hallelujah chorus?"

"Yes, sir, Dave. Out here, under the big sky, I always get back in touch with who I am."

Meditation

'Can we sit in the balcony today? Huh? Can we?'

'I'm told you've been born again, again and again. . . ?'

"...and for today only, you'll get 10% off all tithing!"

Priest

Lounging by the pool

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

FIGHT STRESS: Walk-A-Thon

"Hey, no problem. I am one with multiple tasks."

UNFADED GLORY

'Let us pray...'

But there are other pleasures still for the fisherman's delight....for nature is everywhere about him.

"First time visitors should always check the seating chart before entering the sanctuary."

"Life is very fragile so we should handle it with 'prayer'."

Before pagers,mobile phones and the internet.

"Are there any here today who feel this union is not in the best interests of baseball?"