Church Community Supporter Gifts

'Church Donations'

'Due to the poor response to the roof repair fund we cannot afford to lift the rafters when rejoicing in song.'

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

See you at the farmers market!

Brad Pitt

"...and I, Pastor Smith...preaching to you now from this pulpit, speak to you from experience about the 'strong-willed' child...BELIEVE me!"

"Look at their faces! What did they expect? They never visited her! Of course the will says her money goes to the cat shelter. . ."

FIGHT STRESS: Walk-A-Thon

The Porkypine Pals Christmas Adventure - Part Five

'Neither a lender nor a borrower be.'

"That's our new church mascot."

The Porkypine Pals Christmas Adventure - Part Three

"Giving is down at the church, so we are charging an entrance fee."

"If anyone wants me, Ms. Clark, I'll be down in the youth department."

"What is a drag queen's goal?"

"It would be great if you could turn the smoke machine down a little during worship..."

Alms Bank

"I'll have the usual."

Me and my money are soon parted

Thank you to our awesome NHS staff

'Every year local authorities whinge on about needing more money to maintain services.'

'Details of the summer fete can be found on our website. The address is on the notice board at the back of the church.'

Thank you

'And now, concerning the special collection...'

First Church - New Policy: To avoid lawsuits, Rev. Loomis' sermons no longer mention sinners by name.

Girl Scout cookies selling the girl scout.

Crossing USA Mexico Border

Bubbling

Vicar prays for money for church repairs.

"Thank you."

"So then in comes this good-looking French vet from Vétérinaires sans Frontirères."

'Oooh, honey, will you get me that one?!'

'Getting ready for the church chili supper is bad enough without you calling it the 'Pre-Tribulation'!'

"Nice sermon. Not too preachy."

'We beseech thee oh Lord, tweet us they word.'