Church Camp Escapist Gifts

'I got excommunicated from Church Camp!'

Bo're'droom

Woman dreaming about being on vacation.

'I love our hideaway. I only wish we could find it.'

Ice fisher.

Crowded Ice Fishing

"He's on screen saver. Just tap him."

He can lean back in contentment on cowslip banks and let everything wash over him.

A tourist watches a television on the back of a donkey

'Fred's Office Supply? I'd like to order a dozen more desk bins and a step-ladder please.'

Fish swimming by fishermen's feet - 'This looks like a safe place.'

"I think we're all agreed that we need to focus 110% on meeting strategic corporate goals."

"Could I please go back to the rack now?"

'I was so angry, I got up and tip-toed out of the meeting. I probably should've stomped.'

"We should have done more to bring all the things we were trying to get away from."

"To think—this meeting, which turned into the perfect day, filled with spontaneous adventures that will become priceless memories, could have been an e-mail."

Man fishing while aliens invade.

"Let's go back to our cabana, get into bed and shop online."

"So why do I feel like we're being watched?"

Exit. My problem is restaurants have drive-throughs, and fitness centers don't.

"I'm not lazy. I'm resting before I get tired."

'Yes, John's here, but he can't come to the phone at the moment. He's had a hard day so he's taking some time in his bouncy saucer.'

'You said you were going to put gas in the RV, and then come right back. You've been gone for a year. Care to explain?'

Blowing up the camping mattress.

'Now don't forget, polar bears can be sneaky buggers.'

"But honey, I've spent my last 30 years pretending to look busy. I can't quit overnight."

Contestants defeated in the ring toss competition head back to the hotel to recharge for a late night nude hot tub partying and 'bootie shakin' erotic cage fetish dancing.

'The trick is to make them feel better about themselves without actually paying them any better...'

"And in order to align the designated objectives withthe fiscally driven cross functional departmental...did you understand any of that?" "Only the blah! blah! bit."

'Come back and get me about noon.'

"Mr. Jenkins' idea of paradise is a never occupied loo, a big flat screen with hundreds of free sports channels and a fridge that always gets refilled with beer and pizza."

"Oh, great. The bunny runs away and lives high on the hog on my tax dollars. Next!"

The Wet Fly Man is a more active creature.

"I just did a huge one in my diaper."

"I had a dream about a huge flaming rock falling from the sky! What do you think it means?"