Family Escapist Gifts

Yet another family that decided to drop everything and follow The Grateful Dead around for a while.

"I've decided to re-enter the workforce so I can spend less time with my family."

'Not Andy. He'd rather do anything than go on the family vacation.'

"Mom, I've decided to move in with grandma and grandpa."

Woman dreaming about being on vacation.

'Sorry, but we're going out for dinner.'

'The vegetables sat in the crisper for hours...days...a whole week. Then suddenly, the drawer opened. A hand reached in, grabbed the kale, and all you could hear was the sound of...A Garbage disposal.'

Last Chance For Reality

I've decided to run for office so I can spend more time away from my family.

"Don't you dare try to sneak out of this cartoon!"

'You're so sophisticated and witty...and muscular...do you work out? Why, yes, I'd love to come back to your place.'

"I had a dream about a huge flaming rock falling from the sky! What do you think it means?"

'To attract the most talented spies we're changing our package . . . to jammie dodgers and a gobstopper.'

"This is highly confidential, so, yes, we built a little fort."

Try out this summer's hot novels in a beach setting

"They say walking can change your life. Bye!"

Zoo Employees

Man opens front door to find he's up in clouds.

"He went that-a-way." (snail escapes).

Worker to Boss: "I'd like to work flexible hours to avoid my children."

"I've half a mind to protest."

"I'm un-retiring today. Spending time with my family with hell."

Message in a bottle.

"Hon, I feel like riding out into big-sky country."

'If you keep running away, son, you'll never make it through your formative years.'

Mom? Any chance you could take the kids to your friend's lake cabin? Trying to get them out of your house? Roger. I want to put the vacate" back in vacation.

Ramblers Association

'Sounds way too complicated, let's phone for a take away.'

'I never wanted a dishwasher. I find the best place to get some peace from my teenagers is the kitchen when the sink is full of dirty dishes.'

"We seem to get just the one channel."

"Yo've got to be more specific, Ed. Wake you when what's over?"

Sometimes you wanna go where nobody knows your name

'A lovely area, but not enough waiters!'

"I have no problem with reality. It's just the occasional intrusion of gritty realism that I hate."

Virtual Reality Check