Church Administration Gifts

"A representative from headquarters to see you, sir."

I've always wanted to quit while I was ahead but the opportunity never presented itself.

A paperwork machine spews endless paperwork

"You've got to fill in these forms to join the 'How to reduce bureaucracy' seminar."

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

'It seems every time my business grows so does my paperwork!'

"So we are agreed then, most of the targets we've set staff are completely unreasonable and we should just scrap them."

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

In/Out/These Things Happen.

'Ok, I'm in a paperwork mood. Let 'er rip.'

'I'll be late for dinner, dear, I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

Here and There Trays

"I said he's beginning to teethe...not tithe."

"Morning, all!"

Kid to pastor: 'Which office is heaven?'

'Due to the poor response to the roof repair fund we cannot afford to lift the rafters when rejoicing in song.'

Organization is not rocket science!

"We need to do something about excessive admin. I want you to fill out one of these forms every time you think you're doing some."

'One of the new targets is targeting which targets we're meant to target.'

'You'll soon get the hang of it - then they'll change it.'

"Why do you need so many computers?" "One for billing, one for stock control, one for human resources, one for financial management..."

'The job calls for a little filing now and then...'

"You seem troubled, Pastor. Is anything worrying you...I mean aside from the sins of the world, the vanity of humankind, man's inhumanity to man..."

'It's only fair to warn you that if you get the job there would be a lot of filing involved.'

'ACE Heating and cooling' 'What's Hot' 'What Not'

Deskboxes: 'LATE' and 'NEVER'.

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

Cleric with bible briefcase.

'You can come down a peg. Mesopotamia gave the world bureaucracy, you know.'

Office worker pushing a pile of papers on trolley.

Desk trays - 'In', 'Out', and 'It depends'.

"Do you think we should look again at who we invite to these meetings?"

'You say you type 80 words a minute ... Actually, that's not at all important...!'

Clown Ministry Baptism Today