Christmas Crusaders Gifts

"I am glad to see you are finally putting the holiday items away."

The Corporate Rat.

TV Interactive panto - Remote control buttons: Oh yes it is - Oh no it isn't.

"Have you given any thought to legacy and sustainability?"

"Post-holiday dieting will be much easier this year. Our disposable cash flow will be diverted."

Santa Claus stuck in a chimney sitting in a hospital emergency room.

Holiday Overkill.

Pucker up!

Poinsettia

"Junior, there's more to life than winning. There's also getting compensation for closed-head injuries."

'...My tree! - No my tree!!'

'We'd like to speak with you about your coal policy.'

A well-balanced meal to a kid is a candy bar in each hand.

'On Dasher, on Dancer, on Prancer, and Vixen; On Comet, on Cupid, on Donner and Blitzen...wait, this can't be right.'

Due to company cutbacks please only photocopy one buttock.

Crumpled pieces of paper form the shape of a Christmas tree.

Mall Directory asks, Where's your Christmas Spirit.

'After that 24 hour beer and fruit cake binge, you need a radical detox!'

Xmas wrapping paper blower.

"Coal? What are you, Kringle, some kind of eco-terrorist?"

"They represent the candy cane guild."

Piñata attack

"The media says there's a war on Christmas, and St. Nick isn't in the business of losing wars."

Dueling Christmas Lights

'It mightn't be HD, but it's Christmassy!'

Germ warfare.

"Looks like Rex is ready for his walk."

'I'm brown bagging it today.'

"I love a man with an untrimmed crust."

"Refugees? I don't see any refugees. I just wonder why I can still stand...the Mediterranean sea is six meters deep here..."

"We desperately need to recruit more foster parents....people with compassion, people who care. People who want to make a difference."

'Heck, I'm prepared for anything!'

'I need a larger cubicle.'

"He's say's he's eaten 200,000,000 mince pies, drank 150,000,000 glasses of wine, eaten 300,000,000..."

"And we need some Christmas cards too. . . Get the ones made from recycled paper. . . no point wasting trees. . ."