Christmas Cruisers Gifts

Pucker up!

Old Mother Goose Nursery Rhymes

Mountain bikes and molehill bikes.

TV Interactive panto - Remote control buttons: Oh yes it is - Oh no it isn't.

Angel doing the hula hoop.

"Balance is essential, Ray. For example, this week, my life is purpost-driven, and I'll follow that with seven days of aimless drifting!"

Vicar's driving lesson "Here endeth the first lesson!"

Angels shopping in a store called "Heaven Pharmacy: Self-serve"

"Post-holiday dieting will be much easier this year. Our disposable cash flow will be diverted."

"I'm looking for a car with backseat performance."

Santa Claus stuck in a chimney sitting in a hospital emergency room.

Playboy has rigged his car with a loveseat

Holiday Overkill.

Poinsettia

'My wife insisted I stop and ask someone for directions. Could you just pretend you're giving them to me?'

Somewhere In France...The Watsons have just discovered that English is not the universal language after all.

'We'd like to speak with you about your coal policy.'

"Imagine yourself: driving up the coast, the top down, tears streaming down your face because your wife had no choice but to kick you out, this time for good."

'Free gifts to every kid in the whole world? -- Are you a Keynesian or something?'

Due to company cutbacks please only photocopy one buttock.

Mall Directory asks, Where's your Christmas Spirit.

'After that 24 hour beer and fruit cake binge, you need a radical detox!'

Venice Emergency Plumbing Service

Xmas wrapping paper blower.

'It mightn't be HD, but it's Christmassy!'

Dueling Christmas Lights

"After you build your lowrider, we're gonna look cool cruising the boulevard! When did you get your driver's license?"

"He's say's he's eaten 200,000,000 mince pies, drank 150,000,000 glasses of wine, eaten 300,000,000..."

"You can tell me. They're all knock-offs...RIGHT?"