Christian Mythology Fan Gifts

"One of these a day will keep the doctor away - what ever that is?"

"Will you have a Sphinx?"

'Sooner or later, someone at the party will hand you a sandwich and a glass of wine - then what?'

Viking on beach with rubber ring shaped like viking ship.

Bacchus.

'Let's see here... Mr. Stevens... it says you slipped in the tub and hit your head.'

"Hey, it's not all fire and brimstone anymore—one of our nine circles is even smoke-free."

Iliadette.

Swiss army knife

I sometimes feel spotted, but I never really feel seen.

The Beer Garden of Eden: "This hard cider is life-changing. Try a sip."

No time for sirtaki now, Greece!

"You have to declare what you rob from the rich, but you can deduct what you give to the poor."

'Ignore it! It's just some of the local kids trying to get in for free.'

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

"How can you expect anyone else to believe in you when you don't believe in yourself?"

"I'm working on more of a 'personal' mythology."

'Now that's what I call a really old tree!'

Life and Death

"Hey team, meet our new V.P. of acquisitions and mergers." (businessman introducing a vicking, barbarian)

Going Down?

"Sorry Darling, you are fabulous, but I'm searching for MY Prince too!"

Boy scout replaces Atlas during Bob-a-Job Week.

'No, I won't be celebrating St George's Day.'

Adam and Eve, as old people.

Trojan horse with a satellite dish.

'Not only will you know everything but I'll see that you get your own talk show.'

Bedtime in Ancient Greece

'While Dionysus is indisposed, who wants to take over as God of Wine?'

"And make sure you get my daughter home before sunrise..!"

I came, I saw, I partied!

'I gotta bad feeling about this.'

Moses parting the waves and trolleys appear on the sea bed!

"Um, latest update Noah: the Warrumwarbler is now extinct."

"It's creepy thinking that Santa can sneak into my house undetected. I must find out how he does it!"