Christian Modernist Gifts

"Communion at the contemporary service is scones and coffee."

"Would you like to keep eighty-seven tabs open?"

The Selfie

"If there were really a God, trees would come with outlets and wifi hubs."

KING HEROD INTERROGATES THE WISE MEN TO KNOW BABY JESUS'S WHEREABOUTS

'Let us pray...'

Maybe we should stop calling it 'The Masters.'

T.S. Eliot lacks the courage to eat a peach.

'Shouldn't we be doing this online?'

"And do you, Stephanie, promise to love, honor and 'obey'?

"Will she know what this is in reference to?"

'It's my new fortune e-reader.'

Your basket: Gold. . .You may also like: Frankincense and Myrrh.

"Maybe all spirit filled meetings should be held outside to avoid setting off the sprinklers."

Cliff Richard

"This is the show, Madam."

Thomas Aquinas

"Jim is a good old-fashioned modernist."

Sisyphus Deconstruction

"People don't live like that anymore."

"I'd like you to meet my Husband 2.0!"

"Look, all I'm asking is that we let market forces bring a greater degree of efficiency into our marriage."

'But father, I don't want to plant corn and raise pumpkins, I want to sell real estate!'

'Yes, and don't call me Shirley.'

You Will Find a Nearby Restaurant!

'I keep mine on my IPod.'

Boot Wishes it was Trainer.

"Tell you what, Mark, when we write the gospels, better edit out that bit."

"You know what happens you ASSUME?!"

Snake Charmer Charms His Microphone

Why God created Humans - "Adam, pull my finger!"

"Uh Oh! Looks like you're being un-friended."

"You mind signing this? My kid's is a big fan."

Holy Butterfly.

"I would get baptized, but I have a strange fear of water."