Christian Comedy Fan Gifts

'Do you have any oranges?'

'It's a girl.'

"Follow me and I'll make you 'fishers of men'!"

He must increase; I must decrease - John 3-30

'I expected the wings and the halo, but not the security badge.'

"OMG, LOL!"

'Nice try, but Disneyland isn't a foreign mission.'

'You brought gold? I thought we agreed to a twenty dollar limit?'

'Is there any way we could ease into these GRADUALLY?'

"Jesus is not here. Let's check the one over..."

"You have a divine right - and the left isn't bad either."

Honk if you Love Jesus

Jesus makes water cooler water into wine.

"Gimme a break, guys, it's just until I get the hang of it."

"First, you have to get their attention."

"They are refering to the loaves and fishes as sandwiches."

"It's the new church organ."

"Put some spiritual food in there."

'It's very inflammed. Why don't you take a vow of silence for a few days?'

Beaten up man to Good Samaritan: 'Thank you. My insurance doesn't cover roadside service.'

Man on the way to Heaven worries about steps.

'Adam, are you sure this what He meant by 'being fruitful and multiplying'...?'

'Fred insists on giving something up for Lent!'

Manna Helper

"Hi! Is this Jesus of Nazarath, son of David? This is Stan. We're family! I found you on Ancestry."

'Could you straighten my little brother out? -- he has the Trinity mixed up with the Three Stooges.'

One of the disciples fools around at the Last Supper.

'No gold, frankincense and myrrh, I'm afraid. We were held up at gunpoint by the sheep.'

Basketball Hoop on the Suggestion Box

"Jesus, as a child, heals the blind snowman..."

Jesus meets the 'Little Drummer Boy' again later in life...

Baptisms should always have ground rules: "Make this quick, I can only hold my breath for 17 seconds."

"Let's try this church. They welcome all denominations!"

Ikea Manger

"Any more of that 'cast out the devil' talk and I'll do you for hate crime."