Chore Avoider Humor Gifts

'I know you're sensitive, Wally, but I only asked you to help wash the dishes!'

"It's a smart hamper that sucks up clothes. My mom claims I leave my clothes on the floor, so she has it follow me wherever I go."

"I feel like tearing of all your clothes and putting them in the washing machine."

It's Your Turn to Do the Dishes Tonight!

"The gods seem angrier than usual today."

"I'm starting slowly with a trainer who just stands around talking about his personal life."

The four housemen of procrastination

'If you want to get some exercise, carry this out to the garbage.'

"Mom said mopping up my snow tracks is a good start for my bucket list."

'I don't know who he is...but he roto-tilled my entire yard and never even stopped to let me thank him!'

Pelobong

A genie helps a man fold laundry.

"I'm exhausted! I've just binge-watched the entire series of 'Fresh Air and Exercise.'"

'You always say you'll do things tomorrow. . . but you never do.'

"Remember me? I'm your running shoes. Remember what running is?"

"It's your turn to shovel the perch."

"You'll do anything to get out of taking out the garbage."

"What already?! If it weren't for my extraordinary willpower, I'd be exercising right now!"

5. Install all equipment carefully. 6. Never increase the weight load of any exercise machine when you are by yourself.

"...I love the smell of an uncut lawn."

"Oh, just cellaring. You?"

"He said, 'Won't you guide my sleigh tonight?' I thought that meant steer."

Cat Chores

"Joining the Army was great for me son; he learned a skill and gained a world of self confidence. Of course, he still won't clean his room."

Check out my six pack.

Why do chicks dig vampires? They're forbidden, immortal. They have unimaginable strength. They visit at night, bringing wisdom and sensuality. And if they don't take out the trash or mow the lawn you can burn them to death with sunlight! Yikes. They can get housework done while I sleep.

"It's trouble for Chubby when Mitzi brings out the vacuum."

"Okay, everyone...time to clean up the house. Gracie, what job do you want?"

'She's spring cleaning and you?'

"My blood type...it's the type that doesn't like to exercise."

Mahout and his elephant on wash day.

An overweight lazy man chooses to exercise on a motorbike at a gym.

Clown doing curl with barbell has springing ball emerge from bicep.

"They don't look like the tools you'll need to put the kitchen shelves up with!"

"Uh, it's the funniest thing honey... None of my power tools seem to work! I guess those projects will have to wait..."