Chore Avoiders Gifts

'If you want to get some exercise, carry this out to the garbage.'

"It's true: no more burpees."

"It's a smart hamper that sucks up clothes. My mom claims I leave my clothes on the floor, so she has it follow me wherever I go."

"When was the last time you exercised something other than a purchase option?"

It's Your Turn to Do the Dishes Tonight!

"You need to lose 20 cable channels."

"The gods seem angrier than usual today."

'The doctor said you need more exercise, so I've hidden the remote control.'

The four housemen of procrastination

'I tried running once, but I kept spilling my drink.'

"Our new treadmill is easy to use, you just set it to the speed setting that's most comfortable for you."

'If God had wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them closer to my hands!'

"Mom said mopping up my snow tracks is a good start for my bucket list."

'He claims to be a recovering workaholic.'

'I don't know who he is...but he roto-tilled my entire yard and never even stopped to let me thank him!'

"Will I still be able to not exercise?"

"I'm exhausted! I've just binge-watched the entire series of 'Fresh Air and Exercise.'"

'You need more excercize. But I'm drinking as fast as I can.'

Give me a child at seven and I will show you the MAN!

"I considered riding my bike to work until I realized it involved pedaling and sweat."

A genie helps a man fold laundry.

"My brain said, exercise....my tummy auto-corrected that to, extra-fries!"

'Your back went out because your front went out.'

'But, dear, I am walking the dog.'

"Oh, just cellaring. You?"

"You'll do anything to get out of taking out the garbage."

The doctor told my husband to be active, but the only exercise he gets is running around looking for the TV remote.

'You always say you'll do things tomorrow. . . but you never do.'

"I can’t even find the motivation to quit my gym membership."

"It's your turn to shovel the perch."

"...I love the smell of an uncut lawn."

The Sedentary Dead.

'Oh stop complaining, if it wasn't for the mosquitoes you wouldn't get any exercise at all!'