Chit-chat Challengers Gifts

"You look like you haven't lost weight."

"Where would you see yourself in five years' time?"

"Matthew, did we agree to adopt a whale?"

'This is fantastic! I don't know what's smaller, the talk or the food?'

"I'm suffering the unbearable loneliness of being right on the internet."

Now showing - "What's the least noisy film we can chat through?"

At 4 years old most kids can say easy straightforward sentences.

Nil by text - "Don't worry, Mr. Smith, we will soon cure your addiction."

"Are you busy or are you at work?"

"Let's just do the top layer."

"When I was young, we made statements using signs and marches!"

'With three teenage daughters the phone never rings twice in this house!'

"I'm feeling generous."

'I just got off the phone with my long-time writing partner who's bringing over my deathbed confessional masterpiece. In the meantime, who's up for some idle chit-chat? How about all this rain we've been getting, huh?!"

'This beer is pale and tasteless.' 'Your glass is empty.'

Dadonomics

'Could this mean that we're finally profitable?'

Small Talk Outlet

'I booze, I schmooze and then I snooze.'

"Where do you see this country in five years?"

"This call is monitored for quality. Try to keep up your end of the conversation."

"I'm good thanks."

"You're not holding up your end of the conversation."

'Julie,has anyone told you how beautiful you look today? If so send them in for an eye test straight away!'

Airport Literature

'I see you everyday and never talk to you. But I'm making an effort to change for the better, so I won't be standing here tomorrow.'

'How's it going with me? Oh, you know, still dealing with the same old shit.'

'You'll never win that contest -- you've never said anything in fifty words or less.'

'What do you call two fat people having a chat?'

"Quick, let me through. I'm a gossip."

Online chat

'Why do we always talk about this stuff?'

D*mn it.

Noticeboard with 'latest scandal and rumour update'