Chirp Lover Pillows

"Merry Christmas. You Cheerful, Chirpring, Cheeping, Tweeting, Tw*ttering, Twittering Tw*t!"

Birds reading over woman's shoulder

I understand that our cat Magus died. I miss her a lot. But I wish my parents wouldn't tiptoe around it. House of Java.net Cybercafe. You don't have to watch Youtube clips of CSI: Miami to understand that death is a part of life. The thing I don't understand about our cat's death is, who would've killed her and left a mountain of unresolved clues that only a crack forensics team can figure out? Where were you at 8:45 p.m.? The Youtube Generation grows up fast.

"Do you think the birds like me?"

'Yeah, you have lips like Mick Jagger ... ok, back to the teleconference.'

"This not the way I envisioned falling in love."

Ornithologist

Chorister's Loose Teeth

A family choir

A singer being criticised

Heaven

"I'll kill you if you crack your knuckles again."

"I've got a friend who thinks I'm Napoleon."

"I'm going to need even less tuba."

'...And remember, tune in next week at this same time for the exciting conclusion of 'David and Bathsheba.'!'

'I think the eye doctor got my prescription glasses mixed up with somebody else's.'

'Cannibalism has always repulsed me - until i tasted Aunty Judy's knees'

'You know, I almost envy you sometimes.'

Not that one. It's got the chips in it.

"The Choir Director's out sick, so they're all a but lost."

Surprised cook.

Tutti: When all voices sing at the same time.

Sure you can twitter, but can you chirp, warble and trill?

"It was a lovely holiday. The chips crispy and delicious, the ice cream cornets were to die for, the only downside being, the hostility of the humans, who were reluctant to share their sustenance."

"I'll always love you just the way I am."

"These choir robes are so hot, I'm glad I went commando."

Sport Darwinism

"My business plan? Well, all my friends are addicted, so if I can get access to potatoes and set up a deep fryer, I'll be rich!"

"Freudian Slip"

John Rutter

"I just don't feel like you value my role as associate pastor."

"Sssay, you're a real charmer!"

Does this restaurant allow substitutions? Menu. If we did, do you think you'd be sitting here right now?

"Well of course it's unintelligible. I'm an English professor!"

'Gosh, Jane, you're even prettier than that cute little chimpanzee I was out with last week!'