Chinese Medicine Gifts

'Do you realise that every time I turn my head to talk to you it stimulates Qi flow along the small intestine, triple heater, stomach, spleen, gall bladder and liver meridians?'

'You have too much yin, so I'm going to give you some yang.'

'I hope this alternative Chinese medicine works!'

Fakir on bed of nails reads an 'Acupuncture' book.

'...Acupuncture?...What the hell are you talking about..?'

'If that doesn't work, nothing will.'

"...and the more you puncture, the more endorphins will be released."

"Bladder 1, Stomach 17 and DU1. Collectively known as the 'whole load of nope' points."

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

Self help acupuncture

Super-Tia makes Mal de Ojo undo its curse!

Institute of Health next to Alternative medicine dept

Jesus's First and Less-Heralded Miracle Walk,

'You've got, like, a Feng Shui problem with your pancreas, dude.'

New Age Store.

"You won’t find a more effective antidepressant."

Traditional vs alternative medicine.

Doctor receiving advice from patient's mother

'Doctor, how much acupuncture experience DO you have?'

"Looks like your Yang is on the move again."

Admit it Doc. You're jealous because my home remedy worked better than your fancy prescription!

"All I take anymore is mushrooms for my anxiety, ketamine for my depression, and ibuprofen for the goblins constantly eating my feet."

"Honey, why don’t you tell Tony and Karen about your microdosing-healing-group thingy or whatever the heck it is?"

If all else falls...Mom's Chicken Soup

'Interesting presentation Bradley, except you were supposed to be discussing the nature of the DOW.'

Shaman reads magazine entitled 'Witch Doctor'.

"I'm sensing a nostalgia for when your mother rubbed butter on them."

"I've never seen Tia Carmen so excited about a grand opening."

"I thought I'd give Western medicine one more chance."

'Thyme heals all wounds.'

'He's the star of a new medical series.'

'2 chocolate truffles in the morning and 2 chocolate truffles in the evening should cure your broken heart.'

Man to other coming out of Alternative Health Club: 'I had total joint replacement - they switched me from hemp to medical marijuana.'

"CBD… oil… CBD… oil…"